So many dear and wonderful women I know (including me) get caught in trap of perfectionism on a regular basis.
We wonder: Is this good enough? Will it land with my audience? Am I doing it right? What if I mess up?
These are all common concerns, but they stop us from taking the necessary actions that will propel us toward our ultimate goals. Sometimes this can happen in decision-making as well (as illustrated by my questions below in thinking through my job search):
-academia? public sector? nonprofits? small companies? (note: I have temporarily ruled out large companies)
-program management? project management? people management?
But when we allow ourselves to linger too much on each of the options, we just allow confusion to cloud our judgment.
This is how I feel when I am writing blog entries. I give myself about 20-30 minutes to draft an entry. Then I figure out a picture (~5 minutes?) and get it posted up. If I have a little more time on my hands, I spend another 5-10 minutes editing. In total, I spend no more than 45 minutes on each post.
It is not that I don’t *think* through ideas when I brainstorm topics. But the writing itself is typically posted without a lot of anguish or delay.
And that’s why I can write often without much stress about it. I press the publish button and I let go of the result. I am grateful that so many “citizen journalists” can exist today without editorial gatekeepers.
Sometimes I notice there are typos when I go back and read prior entries, particularly if I did not remember to go back and edit. But well, what can I say? This is the internet. Everything has a pretty short shelf-life.
Very often I will go back and read a month of entries (or entries from the year before) and discover themes emerging that I find interesting. Or I’ll realize: wow, I keep learning the SAME lesson over and over again! 😉
I move on, and I create more. There is very little advantage to spending lots of time to polish each post until it shines. Good enough is good enough.
How many of you on my readership list are current or former members of a Toastmasters club?
I am curious, because if you are, you will know what an “ice breaker speech” is intended to do. It is a way of introducing yourself to the club in a 5-7 minute speech, and helping them to get to know you better.
Whenever I have to speak on a topic for which I have expertise, I feel comfortable. It is harder to give a speech about myself, because it feels more vulnerable and personal. However, after practicing using the voice recorder on my phone in the morning before the speech, I delivered in a way that felt authentic.
My main purpose was to explain the reasons I joined Toastmasters and give them some insight about my motivations, values and goals. I used the term “white Mexican” to describe how I see the world. I was pleased that I got great feedback on the speech and the evaluator thought I used humor, eye contact and gestures very effectively in the speech.
All in all, I am happy to be done with that one. I was not able to write out the speech or even put together an outline. I like to speak a bit more extemporaneously but somehow I found the words I needed by staying present and focused. I am grateful that it is a very kind an encouraging group, so I am looking forward to growing alongside the as we practice our public speaking, evaluation and leadership skills.
Thanks to all of you who encouraged me as I struggled with procrastination. I felt a huge surge of energy after this project was completed. I know the next one will go much better! The ice is broken!
What keeps us going through failure and rejection? Not the cheeriest of starts to a post, but I am working my way to a better place. We’ve just had a restructure at work. They’re never much fun. This one was a marathon that ended in those already well positioned get a promotion, and those of […]
This is a thoughtful piece that I believe many of my readers will enjoy. Happy Saturday, everyone! Hope you have a great weekend.
On Tuesday I got a tour and tried out my first “co-working” space experience, at The Reserve in Roseville. It was a lovely space. This location just opened in October and they also have locations in Edina and Woodbury, two other suburbs in the Twin Cities.
These spaces seem to be popping up more and more. This is a sign of the future: more and more solopreneurs and small business owners with part-time needs for office space that is more sophisticated than a coffee shop. I was struck by how many offerings exist for networking within the membership here, and how willing the Member Services Manager is to connect people and their businesses to each other.
Another appealing feature is that membership plans are a month-to-month commitment so that avoids a long-term lease requirement. The location is excellent – right across from the Good Earth Restaurant, and close to the all-women’s Roseville Lifetime Fitness. There’s a UPS store a short walk from here, along with many retail options. Parking seems plentiful, and it is about a 15 minute drive from home. There is a nice “concierge” kind of feeling to the space in that guest can be escorted in by the receptionist for meetings, and I like the professional vibe.
There was no sales push or pressure to join, since I mentioned I am just getting started doing my research on these options. I may need places where I could have 1:1 conversations with clients in a private environment, and this would definitely fill the bill.
Though I am not sure this option will work for me, it is exciting to feel like I am moving forward on gathering the information I need for this next phase of business-building.
People have often recommended to me that I must try a bullet journal, if I truly want to keep myself organized. When I watched Ryder Carroll’s You Tube video on why and how he created the bullet journal for himself, I definitely felt that “click” in my brain that tells me someone is speaking my language. (Sometimes it’s more of a tingle in my spine rather than an actual click, but you get my point.)
Carroll titles his Ted Talk “How to Declutter Your Mind” and he talks about his experience with a.d.d., which he eventually outgrew. In the process, he designed a system to help him keep track of things, while also being mindful about not wanting to focus on too many different things at once.
We live in a world with so many choices, and for many of us, more freedom than ever. This is why minimalist living has become increasingly appealing to me. Decision fatigue is a real thing. And for those of us who struggle with some attention issues, de-cluttering our minds by creating a mental inventory and writing things down is important.
Once it is written down, we can ask ourselves: do these things matter? Or are they just fleeting notions that take up mental space? Once we cross off those items that do not matter, or that we truly do not need to do, the list gets smaller.
Paying attention to “small projects” that hold our curiosity and recording these, we intentionally make space in our lives to do them. Carroll breaks these into month-long chunks, because it makes them more manageable.
Over time, we make adjustments, through a periodic process of reflection. We keep the mental inventory updated each day (more videos here if you want to explore). On a monthly basis, we take a more top-oriented view, setting intentions that are longer-term in nature.
I tried the practice in January to see if it works for me, and I discovered a few things:
I may write about this experiment again in a month, because I am curious about whether February’s efforts will be refined. I want to improve and customize. I should mention that I still do a “shape of the week” in parallel in which I graph out one full week and fill in the sections with my overall time chunks, and then track actual time.
For those of you who have taken the “bullet journal” path – does it work for you? What clever modifications have you added to make it even more functional?