Since change is a constant

I started out today writing about some hints for people who are managing people remotely during the COVID-19 situation. In my role as an operations manager for remote clinical research team, I learned a lot about managing distributed teams. My direct reports were in 5 different countries, so we were seldom all together EXCEPT via teleconferences.

And then: I got news that my friend’s mother is dying. She’s getting on a plane soon in hopes she can say goodbye in person if her Mom is released to hospice care. Family members cannot visit people in hospitals right now. Oh dear. Complicated.

So the earlier idea has been shelved for later. For now, I will readjust my plans for the week, so I can cat-sit for her.

That is okay. Haven’t we shown how capable we are this week of re-adjusting? That we are not in control of so many events in our lives? 

Change is a Constant

Change in our lives has always been constant. And yet we, as humans, cling to our ways of doing things, our comfortable routines. As a neurodiverse person I struggle to maintain routines, though I know that they help me stay sane on the average day.

Meditation has been a daily practice for over 3 years now.  Wow, am I ever glad I made that commitment. Journaling is also a daily practice for me, removing the “static” from my head and getting some distance from it by writing it out. Anything we can to do help manage our emotions right now is important.

I practice yoga 10-15 minutes most days to calm my nervous system. Some days I take whole hour class online through Tula Yoga & Wellness! I’m grateful they are making classes available via Zoom for those of us who want to stay connected and practicing. I’m also delighted that my NIA teacher Beth Giles is offering her NIA classes via Zoom so I can vary things up! Moving to music is a balm for the soul.

We need to take care of ourselves. This is not something I will sacrifice during this time. Self-care helps me show up for others. I have been able to support friends and family who are struggling via phone calls, walks, emails, etc. Connection is essential for health. What if we tried “virtual presencing” while we do our social distancing? No, it’s not the same. And yes, we need it.

We humans are inherently resilient. It is how our brains evolved thus far. We will get through this together. And our community may grow even stronger as a result.

Stay well, friends.

cristy@meximinnesotana.com

 

 

 

Spread love freely

Happy Valentine’s Day, readers!

desk chair rose

I realize this holiday may not be a universal one, but I have started embracing it as a way to show love to everyone, not just romantic partners.

Maybe this comes from my Mom‘s tendency to send Valentine’s cards and to reach out to show love to people. Or maybe I just know that showing love costs very little, and can create happiness and joy around us.

Yesterday I was listening to the new podcast by the OnBeing called Poetry Unbound. I had the thought: it is our CAPACITY to love that completes us, not one other specific person. We can feel complete when we love ourselves fiercely and deeply. With or without a partner.

(If you haven’t heard yet Poetry Unbound, it’s a beautiful short form podcast that is so wonderful. Treat yourself to this free dose of joy if you are so inclined.)

So what happens when you spread love and it is not returned?

It is still felt. You are the one feeling it. And you always have the choice to feel it, regardless of whether others have the capacity to return it.

I am about to show love for my colleagues by teaching week 2 of 3 of Desk Chair Yoga. What will you do to show love to your family, friends, acquaintances or maybe just people on the street? 

Much love to you,

cristy@meximinnesotana.com

 

 

What gets in the way?

What gets in the way of telling people that you love them?

Not just partners, spouses and friends, but people all around you.

Last year, I kept having an urge to send Valentine cards to my coworkers and employees. But I knew that most people would find that corny.

Why would an operational manager at a large corporation send cards to her employees? Don’t people grow out of that in the 4th grade?

Yup.

What gets in the way of showing loveThat’s what held me back. I was afraid to be perceived as corny, even though I truly grew to love those that worked with me (in an “agape” sense, not a romantic one).

It’s probably very uncool to love your employees.

That is me, totally uncool.

The more I think about it, the more I am proud of that fact. I believe in a model of “servant leadership” in which the person who leads is actually in service to the people they lead.

Very uncool.

And yet, I think it is the most effective way to lead people. To love them, to witness them grow, to help them attain their career goals… that was what made me effective in my previous role.

The clients I serve now? I love them too. Not in a creepy way. But in a way that shows how much I value them as capable individuals, striving toward growth and excellence. We often have similar insecurities. We are all in this together.

Never again will I let the fear of being “corny” get in the way of my ability to show love for people I value. A resolution for today and for the future. Life is too short to hold back.

Happy Valentine’s Day, beloved readers.

cristy@meximinnesota.com